How to Find The ‘Real You’ And Own It

If you’re like most everybody else on the planet, there’s a gap between who you know yourself to be inside, and who you’re allowing yourself to be in the world. Between who you really are and how you’re showing up.

What you know is that you’re passionate. You’re deep. You’re curious. You’re powerful. And you want more.

“What you’re expressing often falls far short of the mark.”

At the heart of the gap is a fear. It’s the fear of vulnerability. The fear to be open and engaged and real. You feel the potential, the impulse, the call. You feel the desire to be more than you’re currently being—but you’re hiding from it. You’re repressing it. Because acknowledging it feels scary and challenging. It feel like too much of a leap.

Who are you to have such ambition? Who are you to reach so high?

You think you’re not worthy. That you’re playing out of your league. You’re afraid of criticism or rejection. Afraid to be thought naive. Afraid you’ll look foolish when you inevitably fail.

The fear keeps you from fully inhabiting your truth. From living it, and from expressing it.

  • You won’t tell your lover that you’ve outgrown him.
  • You won’t tell your parents that they’ll just have to accept you the way you are.
  • You won’t tell your peers that you’re throwing it all away in the name of freedom.
  • You won’t write your book, or travel the world, or stand on that stage and rock the arena.

You put a bottle on your truth: the source of both your power and your vulnerability. Power because the emotion fuels your determination. Vulnerability because you’re forced to confront yourself: naked, essential and alive.

No masks. No pretense. No posturing.

Only you.

Truth is where the passion lives. Truth is your desire, your fear and your grief. The truth will challenge you before it sets you free.

The truth is you have goals and dreams that you’re afraid of sharing because you don’t believe you deserve them. You have goals and dreams that wither on your lips because you lack the conviction to declare them.

The truth is you’re offering only a fraction of what you’re capable. Only a fraction of what you have. You’re not stretching yourself. You’re not feeling your emotions deeply. You’re not being real.

  • Do you really believe that you can quit your job and live the Internet lifestyle?
  • Do you really believe that you can do what you love?
  • Do you really believe that you can find your power, rock the stage or change the world?

Maybe you don’t.

Wanting something when you don’t believe you can have it is painful. So you resolve the dissonance by muting the desire. But that’s tantamount to denying yourself. Denying your truth. Denying your self-expression.

You shut down. You switch off. You hold back. You hold back who you really are and settle for a half-expressed shadow of yourself.

No one can hurt a shadow.

But eventually you get something worse than hurt. You get numb. You get stagnated. You start to forget what it’s like to have a purpose in your life. To be inspired. To be in love. You start to forget what it’s like to have something worth hurting for.

And you start to think that this is normal.

And it is.

But it’s not good enough for you.

Because you demand more from life. Because you demand that life demand more from you. It’s not about deathbed regrets. It’s not about success or failure. It’s not about beach side condos or four hour work weeks.

It’s about making it count for the sake of today. It’s about living as fully and as truthfully as you can. Being present in each moment. Knowing that you’re true to you. That you’re walking your path with trust and courage and authenticity; and that when you inhabit that truth fully and authentically that fear ceases to have any meaning because there’s nothing you need that is apart from you.

But you have to step up. You have to claim it.

Until you can own the idea how are you going to own the result? Until you can own the idea, how are you going to take the first step?

Own the desire. Be present with it. Not consumed by it, just present with it. Acknowledge its energy—the way it moves you. The way it wants to move you.

“Now stop telling the story about why it can’t happen.”

Doing anything remarkable, creating anything in your life begins not with an action…

Not even with a belief.

It begins with allowing yourself to want it.

So do that, okay?

4 Things You Need To Know to Live an Original Life

19 Things You Need To Know About Pete Davidson